Life Events

Our son will graduate from Pre-School this Friday June 8th.  For many of you this may seem insignificant or silly that I am blogging about this, but for me this is going to be a very tough day. Why?  Not only is our little man growing up, but this will be the first of many life events that my Dad won't be here.

In the past my parents were unable to attend many events due to living in Ontario, however I could call them afterwards, send pictures and describe how cute the boys were.  Obviously, I can still do this with my Mom, yet it will be different.  My Dad won't be part of it.

My Dad always loved hearing about the boys and their accomplishments.  He would ask so many questions and talk about their bright futures.  He could not wait to see pictures and loved to talk to them on the phone.  He loved them so much.

I know in my heart that I can still talk to him, but it is not the same.  I am not able to hear him speak to me.  He can't ask questions.  I won't be able to see or hear the smile on his face when he talks to them.  He was supposed to be here for all of this.  I am so lost without him.  Life will never be the same.

Last night, I took his picture off my dresser and placed on my bedside table.  I just needed him closer to me.  I would do anything to feel his arms around me again.  I just hope that in some small way, Lee and Owen will remember him too.